WORTH THE PAIN

I was 12 going on 13 and off to the big school----girls were still icky and not to be spoken to.
But it was different---they were so much older there----most of them had breasts or were very quickly developing them and suddenly became interesting.
Even the girls that went to the same lower school were sprouting noticeable chest flesh.

My brother was a year ahead of me and was not impressed that his little brother was now hanging around-----we had made this agreement that I wouldn't hang around him at school but his girlfriend from the lower school days had developed into a beautiful 14 year old and her friends were the popular girls.

One in particular, Mary, just seemed a class above every other girl at that school. She was beautiful, athletic, outgoing, popular and had this wonderful personality that drew everyone to her. She knew who I was and would always smile when she caught me staring at her but never spoke.
She really was my first crush but I have always been realistic and considered her out of my league.

Mary was there for 4 out 5 of my years at that school and for those 4 years I had the pain of a schoolboy crush and then a year of school with no Mary.

Fast forward 4 years and I was working and being the typical young guy, spending my money at the bar as often as I could.
I struck up a friendship with a scruffy looking lad who was one of two "bikers" in the area. I could never understand how he had the best looking girlfriend in the district. She was still a school girl and her parents did not approve of John and she was forbidden from seeing him---but she would sneak out on a regular basis.

I had just broken up with my girlfriend when John asked me if I would take him to the drive in movies.----"It's like this mate, I don't have a car and my girlfriends sister doesn't mind me, so she is going to bring her to the drive in and give us some time together"
What the hell---he was a good guy and I could get a few vodka mix cans and have them while he was off with the girlfriend.

No sooner did I park the car and he was off looking for their car.
I'd just settled in with a cigarette and a vodka can when the passenger door opened and in jumped Mary----my heart skipped so many beats as she smiled at me.
"Long time Clyde"----"Hey, she is my little sister and when he told me who had brought him, I wasn't going to sit there and watch those two, so if you don't mind, I thought I'd join you."

We didn't see much of the two movie program but for no other reason than we talked and laughed for the three hours plus.
We talked about school days and me staring at her---about what we had both done since those days and the school mate we would still see or keep in touch with.
Mary had rebelled against her parents and had moved interstate---she was home for a month to patch things up.

The night ended all too soon and she leaned across the car a kissed me on the cheek----I laughed and said "Well that started it over again---you caused me pain at school and now you are off into the night"----she laughed and said those cutting words---"You are a good guy Clyde"

Two weeks later I was at a local Pub Disco with a few friends when Mary walked in.
She smiled at me and joined a group at another table. I noticed her a few times during the night but she was with friends and I still thought that she was well out of my league so I didn't approach her.
It was an hour before closing time when she walked over to our table. My back was to her and she tapped me on the shoulder and said "Well are you ever going to dance with me"---my mates faces dropped---the best looking girl in the place is asking Clyde to dance.
The music slowed and Mary spent the next hour in my arms---I was in heaven---we talked, we laughed, we looked deep into each others eyes, we kissed---the pain was gone.
She asked if I could take her home----I had been drinking but would have risked driving for her but she said walk---she said "When I walk out of places like this alone, I get followed and pestered".
We didn't go straight home---we walked to the end of the fishing jetty---we talked, we kissed, we laughed, we held each other tight and made promises with all good intentions. We walked barefoot along the beach to the top of her street, we stood before a glowing moon and held on forever.
She laughed as I brushed her feet and fitted her shoes---there was a "Cinderella" reference as I took her hand and we walked to her door
She was like that little schoolgirl again as she giggled---we shared that long last kiss and she was gone.

I have never seen Mary since that night.
I had all of my fantasy with my fantasy girl----I wanted no more

WHY ?

You work with a lot of people in your life time.
You develop friendships and acquaintances----you just know all of these people to certain degrees.

They are work "mates"----

You may not really like them or what they do in their private lives, but you feel some attachments.
I had a very strange relationship with this guy
He could always make you laugh---he always had something to say
He had a great interest in photography and motor racing---he combined the two.

I got an email from old workmates that he was in trouble.
He had been caught out trying to photograph female employees in their change room, using his mobile phone.
Of course the photos had been deleted by the time they grabbed his phone.
I had spoken to him before about inappropriate associations with young female employees.

They shifted him to another location while things were investigated---
But the investigation is over

He hung himself in his home work shed.

He had a wife and two young children

Why would you do that
How could you
It is going to be your family to find you
How ?
Why ?
Is it the ultimate selfish act ?

Besides his family, the woman who he tried to photograph feels guilt---why ?
And some of his workmates look at her like she has some responsibility.

Why ?

WAY TO GO

There will always be people in your life who you will like from the moment you meet them

I have been involved with harness racing for far too many years but had the luck to be involved with some very knowledgeable horsemen. Horsemen who taught me to watch and listen---taught me to actually see what a horse was doing and to know why they were doing it.

I met Colin a good few years back----his personality was infectious---his horses not very talented----but he had a love for his horses and for what he was doing.
He was always willing to listen when someone gave him some advice and was always willing to try something new.
You just couldn't help but like the guy and be infected by his love of life and his lifestyle.

He laughed at me when he got up and beat my horse in a photo finish after trying something that I had suggested----I was pleased for him and he understood that I was just as pleased that my advice had worked as I would have been if my horse had beaten him.

My horses beat him home in a lot of races and he was gracious about it, but always reminded me of his conquest.

Colin had to stop driving horses after suffering a heart attack at a very young age.
His interest in harness racing never wained and he put his heart and soul into pony racing, with his young son driving the family's team of ponies.

The years passed and Colin's son outgrew the ponies so Colin established a team of horses the lad to drive.
His health had improved and he was passed to race drive himself.
He did very little driving, preferring to give his son as much experience as he could get.

Just before Xmas I watched one of his horses race----the horse was a pacer and intrigued me the way that he went---he was not rough in his stride but unusual----
I couldn't stop thinking about the horse and drove out to Colin's property early one morning to watch the horse work----the more I watched, the more I saw it and I had to tell him.
"Mate, that horse is trying to trot in his hopples----take them off and I'll bet he doesn't pace"-----he took the hopples off and the big horse trotted but needed balancing in his feet and shoeing.
Two weeks later, after a few visits and Colin's son following my shoeing instructions, the big former pacer was really starting to look like a racing proposition as a trotter.

Colin took the horse to the racing trials and in a field of 10, the big bloke behaved himself and finished 4th
It may have been a bit soon, but Colin couldn't wait to race him and nominated him for a race last Friday week.

I had to go to watch it happen----Colin's son had to work so Col was driving the horse himself.
He was like a kid with a new toy----he was excited about the horses prospects in the race.
I helped him harness up and sent him out----you could see the life in the man---he was proud of his horse and had a pride in himself to be back race driving-----it was his life, his enjoyment.

It might have been a fairytale
We will never know
There he was---the big horse and Colin running fourth with a lap to go----the horse was going well---maybe it could have been----but the horse slowed dramatically, Colin slumped forward in the cart and tumbled to the track.
The track attendants raced to his side----the paramedics were there in seconds----the race went on, the big horse was lose on the track.

Colin died that night----a massive heart attack.

No matter how sad, I can't hep but think that it was a great way for him to go---doing what he loved and with a chance to win that race.

He will be missed by a lot of people

YOU DON'T KNOW ME

Here we are writing blogs in countries all over the world.
The chances of us meeting up are pretty remote, so we can write what we like.

The truth is that I am a 16yo black girl living in Indonesia.
I sit naked in front of my computer playing with my ample breasts while reading your posts.

I have no idea how accurate your persona's are

Jimmy Bastard could be a 25yo gay florist from London
Mapstew is actually my dream girl playing in an Irish family band.
Sister Deb is actually a 6'9" male basketballer from Detroit
Scarlet is a redheaded 84 yo grandmother with chin hair
Donut Girl is really a 16yo school boy virgin---so I could be in love because he lives next door
Of course Spiky is real---no one could make up that life
And of course, Steph is real---no one else could have a shoe collection like that and not be exactly Steph

Me. OK, I am who I say I am
If I was gonna make it up, I would be younger, better looking, have a lot more money and have a much more interesting life to tell you about.

No I am not a 16yo big breasted girl from Indonesia, but I could be

You would never know

Jimmy a florist---yer, right---ha ha ha

Yes, I typed it left handed

MAY YOUR WISHES COME TRUE

I would love to write more but I am right handed and that is in a splint at the moment.
Some unkind people have suggested that it may be as a result of my frequency of wanking but my doctor says it is a long term thing finally coming to a head---oh, hang on---long term----hmmm, maybe.
But being right handed---yeh, OK, it's my wanking hand, but it is also my dominant hand-----alright, OK, it has dominated me on the odd occasion----but my typing with left only is bloody slow---so
Oh, it's a torn wrist cartilage----maybe surgery and drugs---OK, now you know---but

I couldn't let is pass----

May you all have a great celebration for the passing of the old and the coming of the new

May the New Year bring you joy
May you receive all that you may wish for
May there be peace in your life and in this world

Happy New Year


Hmm, I wonder if I can do it left handed----type, you perverts

FAMILY DECEMBER TIME

It's on the way
It's nearly here
That day when most families in the world get together for varying reasons.
Those with some sort of christian belief get together to celebrate the birth of a child---those that have deviated from those beliefs use it as a holiday and get together to celebrate the holiday----and those not of a christian belief use it as a time just to get together.

So no matter what it is a family time----time when all of the sins for the year are forgiven over some sort of feast or celebration.
If we are too far from our families, we try to contact them if we can

It is Christmas

I never knew my paternal Grandparents and even though my Grandmother gave birth to more children, my Father was an only child----the family cemetery plot records a brother and a sister by name but others who died before even being named.

My maternal Grandparents lived very close---the back of their block ran into the side of ours. My Mother had two sisters and one brother.

Christmas day always brought a gathering at my grandparents house---their four children with their partners and all of their children----eleven in all at the end.
As it got bigger and my grandparents got older, the gathering shifted to our house---all of the kids would head for the beach during the preparation and while the adults rested after stuffing themselves full.
Great times

I was 17 when my grandfather died two days before Christmas----my grandmother couldn't stay in the house----we cancelled the gathering---it was a very sad year.

My Mother tried to organise the next year but some of the family members weren't interested and had another side of their families to go to.
That year Christmas dinner was our family---my parents, my brother and me.
And that is the way it was til I married and it became extended family with my wife and her daughter from a previous marriage.

After my divorce, it became four of us again----the family.
My brother died two years later and then there was three.

My brothers death broke my fathers will--- his family line was riddled with colon cancer and dad had beaten it twice----my brother didn't----he made it his fault.

My father died a broken man, withdrawn into himself and not communicating with mum or me.
And then there was two

The year that my mother died was her time----she was old, she was frail and she had fought every battle a woman should ever have to.

I didn't realise til Christmas that year what it meant.
It meant--and then there was one.

I still feel that it is the family time of the year. I can't bring myself to join in with the family of friends---it's my family day.

Please, be with your families if you can----if you cant, please contact them---tell them that you love them.

Me, OK, I'll be with mine. Their ashes are spread on my beach along with the ashes of my last dog that they all knew.
I'll be on the beach with my dog to wish them all a Merry Christmas.

May you all have a great family time.
May the love of your families warm your hearts.
May Christmas bring you all that you need.
And may the New Year bring you all that you deserve.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

KARMA ?

We only had one horse entered to race that night---he was a bad horse to transport so he was in a two horse float by himself and I rode in the float with him.----I had to---just to keep him occupied and stop him from scrambling and climbing the walls.

I could hear the crashing and banging before we pulled into the park ----people were yelling and a woman was running around the park wailing and screaming "Tarses is down, Tarses is down, Tarses is down".
My horse was getting stirred up by the commotion so I unloaded and got him settled in the horse stalls before thinking about what a Tarses was.
My old mate Jim said to me "I'll look after him, go and see if there is anything you can do out there---that horse has fallen in the float transport and they cant get him up or out---but watch yourself, he has kicked three blokes so far"----he was chuckling as I walked towards the park.

Well, there he was, Tarses, a big black stallion laying on his side, thrashing around and lashing out at anyone who dared come near to help.
They had tried everything, so they said---tried to pull his head up to make him get up---tried to get ropes on him but he had lashed out and kicked everyone who got near--they had tried with a neck rope and head collar but without him making any effort, they were frightened that they would damage his neck

I watched for about ten minutes and finally fronted up and said to the bloke who owned him "Have you got any water in a container?"----he looked at me like I was stupid----"well, have you got any water----has anyone here got any water or a can of drink"?-----
All of the people around just looked at me but no one came up with the water---
So I climbed in the front of the float and could basically stand out of danger with one foot either side of the hoses head-----I just looked at the people at the back of the float and said "Well, if no one has any water, would you mind getting out of the way and take any women away, I'm a little shy"

Lucky I needed a piss, so with the best aim I could in the circumstances, I pissed in Tarses ear----
Well, crash, bang, heave, and scramble, he was on his feet and half way off that float.
His trainer looked at me and said "You pissed on my horse"----I said "Well you wouldn't get me any water---and I've never known a horse yet that will lay down with an ear full of water"
There was not a word of thanks----they just couldn't believe that I had pissed in its ear.

Old Jim laughed his guts out when one of his mates told him what I'd done---and was still chuckling an hour later as we harnessed our horse for his race.
We walked up to the track as the race driver warmed the horse up in his preliminaries-----I went into the betting ring to have a few dollars on our bloke--we thought he had a good chance.----I couldn't believe it---there was Tarses in our race and still racing---surely the stewards would have scratched him on a Vets inspection----not my problem.

Our horse Bushman's Song, put up a great performance to be beaten by a nose in a photo----by, yep, you guessed it----TARSES

The owner trainer had not reported the incident in the car park and had not had the horse inspected by the Vet----a bloke told me that he hadn't even washed my piss off him.

KARMA, Ha