Monday, 10 August 2009


OK, let's finish this story and get on with life.

Things were looking good----having met this "lovely" lady on the beach, taking her out to the marina for breakfast and finding out that her 17 (I was wrong)year old daughter was the spunky young blond dog owner I had met on the beach some months before. And we are going out to dinner

OK, we are up to date.

So there is this magnificent Chinese Restaurant overlooking the lakes with a great piano bar----the food is wonderful. I made a booking and went to pick up the yummy mummy at the prearranged time.
When I told her where we were going she said "Oh, I don't like Chinese food"--well they do have an expanded menu with very good Thai and Indian----"Oh, I'm sorry Clyde, I don't like foreign food---actually, I don't like Asians"
OK, knock me down---a big admission on your first "date" but honest.
I thought that there had to be a very good reason, so I went with the flow even though I have no racial prejudices or preconceptions-----I am a bit worried at this stage.
So on her choice we head for a local pub------hey, this is gonna be cheaper and I don't really mind this place.
We walk in through the front door and some guy talks to yummy mummy---fine, she stops to talk to him but doesn't introduce me----hmm, OK, it's a first date---we head into the dining room and a table full of people says hi to her but we don't stop---the food waitress knows her by name----hmmmmm-----the barman knows her by name and knows what she wants to drink----hmmm, OK, she is a regular.
Now during pre dinner conversation another guy comes over and starts taking to her---she carried on the conversation til he looked at me and said "Sorry mate, my name is Rod"
YM said "Oh, yeh, hey Rod, you wouldn't believe where Clyde tried to take me for dinner---bloody chew and spew"----Rod chuckled and said "He'll learn"

Our dinner arrived and Rod left---we exchanged small talk-----I was busting to ask but left it alone.
The rest of the night was filled with people talking to her and me not being introduced to half of them.
It was late when we got to her house and she had to work the next day so she asked to be excused and said it was a great night and she couldn't wait to see me again.

I was disturbed by the racism and by being ignored while she spoke to so many other people but put it down to a first night a few nerves.
She phoned me the next day to tel me that she had really enjoyed the night---that she was having an early night that night but would love to see me the next night---"what about we go to the pub again--it's a relaxing place"----so why not.

OK, fast forward here a little----you don't need to know---and no, I wasn't getting any---you perverts

It was Saturday night---we are going out-----there are choices---there is no work for her the next day-----dinner, movies, river cruise, trotting races, football match, nightclub, takeaway and DVD, any of the above and a walk on the beach with a bottle of champagne, a cemetery tour.
And the winner is "Clyde, why don't we just go to the pub?"
So we went to THAT pub---didn't want to go to another
Dejavu-----not introduced to another dozen people and ignored while she spoke to half of the people in the pub.
I had decided that this was my last night with yummy mummy---but then she said "Clyde, why don't we go early and go back to your place and fuck".-----come on, not me, that was word for word---YM said FUCK
Now, I have to tell you---Yummy Mummy is very yummy----ok, for those who can't work out yummy, this is one very spectacular looking lady, body to die for----so who am I to knock it back

But here it is----I just cant forget the racist bit of the first night----now, it would have been easy to let it go and had a great night exploring the mountains of Europe and canyons of America looking for the eruptions of a dormant volcano but I can't.
We are in the car and I just have to ask
"So what is this problem that you have with Asians?"---"Is it a war thing to do with Vietnam or the Japanese of WW11?"------"Have you had a very bad experience with someone Asian ?"
"No, I just don't like them or their food---there are too many of them in our country---they're taking over---they are everywhere---them and their fucking restaurants------breeding all their little fucking Asian kids"
But YM "They are people, the same as you and me---they have migrated here the same as most of our forefathers and all of our Italian and Greek communities---they are Australians"
YM said "You have to be joking, them and the bloody Italians and Greeks, they come here and think that they own the place---they should all go home"

Well that was it and home it was
Her home----I pulled up out the front of her house, got out of the car, opened her door and told her how self absorbed she was and that I couldn't be with anyone who was so racially intolerant.
My God, I could have waited one more night----or at least 3 or 4 hours

This morning as I walked the beach the pooch was joined in the water by a golden retriever----I didn't look around---I didn't want to know and then I heard---
"Hi Clyde, you really pissed mum off"
There was the 17yo from that first morning
"Sorry, but I have my reasons and I think I am right"
She snickered "So do I ----she is a racist bitch and she is up herself with all her pub mates----I'm sorry---I hoped it would work out----I would have liked for you to be around"

I smiled----"You know where I am"


Jimmy Bastard said...

You did the right thing pal. I was torn between leaving her dripping and still hungry for more as you headed for your car after saying "Yeah yeah, I'll call you"

In hindsight though.. good call.

savannah said...

good call is right and well done, sugar! xoxox

Fanny F said...

I couldn't imagine you doing anything else but ditching her, Clyde. Pity it didn't work out but, really, who wants to hang around with bigots. Attraction and sexiness comes from within, no matter how good the body.

Clyde said...

Funny, but I wasn't torn at all.
She had become very ugly to me---and I don't mean her looks.
But I must go back to her pub with a very attractive Asian friend

Clyde said...

It actually feels good
I can't say that I hate much in this world but intolerant racists top the list.
I understand racism for a reason but not just for feeling superior.

Clyde said...

I actually had a friend who had a phobia about redheads---he used to get quite vocal
Another who hated Catholics----neither could give me a reason why.
They are no longer friends
Geez, nothing like a redheaded, Asian, Catholic schoolgirl to get the blood rushing---Ha

So it comes from within--how come you are attractive and sexy on the outside then ?

Scarlet-Blue said...

I'd have done the same as you.
Not so yummy on the inside, was she? [Not literally... oh crikey, I'm going to type myself into a hole... see.]

mapstew said...

Good on ya!

We think we've come a long way, but some people haven't come very far at all!

(There's a song for ya at my place.)

Spiky Zora Jones said...

clyde clyde...what a man. if you were here. Oh the things I'd do to you.

I love the man you are. And that bitch doesn't deserve a fine man like you. rock.

my brother in law is like her. I won't let him say such things around my kids. What makes him so superior and who is he to decide who goes where.

sweetie.... (((MWUAH)))
ciao xxx

Clyde said...

Miss Scarlet
I didn't quite get that far
It was like a footballer with white line fever---get her off the beach or near that pub and she was another person----but I'm glad I saw that person
Geez, I'm glad I saw it early

Clyde said...

I'm not sure how far we have come
We have learnt to hate by race, colour and religion.
I just want to love by living

Hey thanks for the song---unlike Jimmy, I'm in love with Sharon

Clyde said...

Toni my sweet
It has nothing to do with deserving.
I got what I desrved by looking at the shell and not hearing the heart.
Hey, I love you for your honesty--for your love of life----
Of course the fabulous body is a bonus


Beware of picky eaters.

Clyde said...


Funny you should say that
It seems to be that people who wont try a variety of food dont have a variety of thoughts---hmmm, food is the answer

mapstew said...

I've told Sharon!
Waiting for reply!


Clyde said...

Thanks Stew
Geez, pity Australia beat Ireland in that football game---3 nil---
Actually enjoy Gaelic football and Aussie rules
Sent you an email re Gathering
Might be just Scottish with the Irish bands there
Might have to be a meeting of Jimmy, Stew and Clyde
Hey, wonder if I can get Spiky to come

-eve- said...

am intrigued :-)
good on yer, Clyde :-) you stuck to your principles, and refused the bait ;-) - way to go! :-D
I like the ending with the daughter, too - even the kid agreed with you ;-)

Anonymous said...

Doesn't she know about the Genographic Project? Doesn't she know we're ALL related? lol people like that are just... hahaha hilarious, they're like 'living dinosaurs' or something like that. Anyway, you should tell her to send a DNA sample to the GP(, wait for the results and then... faint. Ah! and please take a pic of her priceless face after knowing the oh creepy true! An overdose of reality would be good for her... jijiji (I'm so evil!) >:)

Anyhow... she lives in a bubble. Too bad for her, she misses a lot of amazing things just for a mistaken thought.

Clyde said...

Geez, we are all related---
Hmm, now we shouldn't do things with our sisters--ok
So how far should the separation be ?
Oh, it was a priceless look