Tuesday, 29 March 2011


I really don't care what your customs and beliefs are.
And as long as they don't cause harm to man, woman, child or beast, I will defend your right to celebrate in any way that you want.

Religions of the world amuse me because they all believe that they are right and obviously, if they don't all come to the same conclusion, there is going to be a lot of disappointed people on "judgement" day.

If they are all so wonderful, so holy, so forgiving, so compassionate, then why do they think that it is just them who will get the big reward.

Just for the record, I don't believe that there is any great reward nor do I think there should be----well, not for those who get a fair chance at life---but it would be nice to think that there was seconds for those who got robbed a little early.

I have got to that age where I have attended a few funerals and the daily newspaper is likely to direct me to more.
It is funny that only good people die---well it seems that every service I have heard focuses on the goodness of a persons life.

I attended a funeral for a man in my ex-wife's family where everyone who spoke told of a good gentle, honest man---yet I know that he beat his wife, molested his three daughters and adopted his brother's war heroics and exaggerated an injury to increase his pension.
Yet I attended a funeral for a young girl from work who was hit by a bus on her way home. She was the sweetest kid that you could meet and lived for her family, her husband and her religion.
Her service was cold and so matter of fact that her death was god's will and that she would be back---even to the stage of telling her young husband not to worry because they would find him a new wife.
The things I learned from her funeral was that this "Christian" religion did not believe in cremation and did believe in reincarnation--not the soul but the body---on "the" day, they shall spring from their graves----gonna be some ugly sights if they are right.

Today I attended a Buddhist funeral/viewing for my mate's father-in-law.
There was ceremony, yet not a structured ceremony
There was laughter yet no one made a structured speech
There was customs to be dealt with.
There was chanting, yet it was recorded
There was candles and incense
And there was money

Money---yes money---the coffin was stuffed with money---but it wasn't real---you buy it in bundles with denominations from US dollars, British pounds, French francs--it's all photo copies. They actually remove the body from the coffin and fill it with "money", put him back in then pad it with "money"--give him some new wrapped clothes and a $2.00 watch and then cover him in in "money".
People approaching the coffin drop in a coin of real money (I wondered if I should make a wish) and there is a coin between his lips---his wife had to wash her eyes before she gazed on him
Once everyone has said their farewells, everyone in procession walks around the coffin three times---I waited for Simon to say that I should hop on one leg, but it didn't happen)

We all left to go to the family home where it was just food and laughter and nothing was said about the old bloke--
But it is not over yet
In a couple of days we go back and get his ashes---yes, they burn all of the fake money---and take his remains to a temple and place them in a wall for the dead.
The best bit about this process is that we have got a whole load of this "money" and we throw it from the car on the way to the temple----of course we will get arrested for littering.

Oh, and if we haven't done it right, he will haunt us tonight.

All of these customs and beliefs will give comfort to his family left behind him.
If they get that comfort, then it is a wonderful belief

Oh, and if you can spend that money Joe, let me know and I'll bring some with me.

If you get some comfort from your beliefs, then they must be right


Pearl said...


I attended a funeral last year where the body was cremated, put in an urn -- and buried. Am I the last one on the planet to understand this? It still strikes me as counter-intuitive that they buried the urn...

I do not have a belief system, although I rarely tell anyone. I've learned over the years that this gives many people a way of judging what kind of person you are without knowing shit about you. :-) Not that I'm bitter.


Clyde said...


I really dont care what people think about my beliefs---but I will not try to impose them on anyone else.
Both of my parents believed in a Christian religion but I like my father's take on it.
He grew up just off a main road with churches of just about every denomination---on Sunday he would go to church but he tried every one of them---I sometimes wonder if he was checking out the young ladies..
Good luck to anyone with a belief--I hope it gives them comfort

Jules said...

My husband is New Zealand Maori and when his mother died last year we had a tangi. We all go the marae (meeting house) and everyone stays there sleeping next to each other on mattresses surrounding the body. This went on for three days and every day new people would arrive and be greeted onto the marae with song. Speeches were made throughout the day and everyone pitched in to cook and serve in the kitchen and mess hall behind the marae. There was laughter, tears, wailing and somebody has to be with the body at all times. When you enter or leave the marae you have to cleanse yourself with water. On the last day the coffin is closed and the last speeches are said. It is a very emotional time, oh and everyone that visits the body brings envelopes of money (called a koha or donation) to give to the immediate family. Out of that combined money the family makes a donation to the marae of around $500 to cover the power costs for the three days and then they can do what they want with the rest. We were left with around $2,500. It went towards her funeral costs.

Clyde said...


It is almost a wonderful celebration of family and life---so much better than morbid funerals where lies are told and false tears shed

Anonymous said...


Besides, too much melodrama is a waste of energy, which only serves to fuel the wrong emotions.

Jimmy said...

That'll be right. Your fae Clydebank my friend, we are all riddled with the awfie guilt of spent religions.


LOL You're funny Clyde. I am not sure if I was supposed to laugh at this post but I did. :)

Clyde said...


I'm sure that friends and relatives all have their own thoughts and memories--but then they get to a funeral and it seems to be a competition for who can say the nicest things.
Personally, if people are good enough to gather to say goodbye to me, I'd rather that they do it at a bar---and I'll leave some money to buy the drinks---maybe after a few, they will tell the truth

Clyde said...


I've never been too sure, but I think religions thrive on the guilt of their followers.
And they are very forgiving of the sins comitted by those who donate the most.
Personally, my money will be on the bar

Clyde said...


You have to have a chuckle when you think that only one group can be right but maybe none-----and we will never know

the feeling lioness said...

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Clyde said...

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