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Saturday, 11 December 2010

NEVER TOO OLD ?



It is funny that when you are 16 / 17 / 18 / (insert other here )and you have become sexually active (your having it), you think that sex is the domain of the young and you are going to get what you can.

(Sorry, I forgot the Catholics----when you are 32 and have left your mothers house)

Well, young guys are trying to get all that they can and tell all of their mates how well they are doing (liars)--and young girls, petrified by the first experience, are trying to fight off the young blokes and telling their friends that they haven't done it yet.

The one thing that you never want to think about is your parents having sex---no no no, not never no.
But if you look at it, your parents were mid 30s to 40s when you joined this sexual revolution, so there is little doubt that they were comfortably shagging at home in bed when your spotty arse was bobbing up and down in the back of a car.

And worse than that, your grandparents were in their 50s to 60s and they were probably plonking their teeth in a glass alongside the bed and fumbling around under the sheets---granny may have even been giving grandpa a gummy, oh no, not oh shit, that is sick.

But the older you get, you realise that life didn't stop in your teens, twenties or thirties.

An article published this week in the local statewide paper, said that research has shown that one third of Australian men aged between 75 and 95 are still active between the sheets.
Now I'm only guess that they had a partner, because it didn't make that clear, but 95---oooohhhheeee, there is plenty to look forward to.
A further survey of 3274 men found that the frequency might not be there in the 70s, 80s and 90s but there was activity---about half of those sexually active were satisfied with the frequency---so I'm guessing the other half were getting a knock back here and there.

I showed the article to a friend of mine who is the nursing director of a local nursing home. She laughed and said that I would not believe the sexual activity that goes on in nursing homes.
And the best news that she gave me was that the women out number the men by three to one in most nursing homes.

So if you think that your age group is doing better than any other, then maybe you should think again
And if you are thinking that your sex life is coming to an end, maybe think again---well, unless you are 104

And if you are a teenager, yes, your parents are, your grandparents probably are and great grandad is a stud down at the nusing home.

Of course, if you are Catholic--it started at 32 and its all over by 42, so you'll just have to do for yourself and go to confession

25 comments:

The Invisible Seductress said...

Too funny Nursing Homes are the new "club scene"!!!

xoxo

Pearl said...

An ex worked in a nursing home and he told many stories about the sexual activity of the nursing home. :-)

Human beings. Until you're dead, someone's trying to get in your pants.

Pearl

Ponita in Real Life said...

As a nurse, yeah... it continues pretty much until you are dead! I once worked at a home with married couples living there... who shared a room but had twin beds... they wanted sex but not to sleep together! Actually, it was so very sweet to see two old folks, in wheelchairs or using walkers, sitting side by side, holding hands and exchanging the occasional smooch.

Love doesn't die just because you get old... and sex doesn't either. Funny how young folks just don't seem to get this.

Clyde said...

Seductress

I think it's wonderful and something to look forward to.
I might just book myself in now--don't want to miss out

Clyde said...

Pearl

It's good to know.
And I've heard stories that it doesn't stop when your dead---but thats a bit sick

Clyde said...

Ponita

I guess it depends on your age---early on it is your domain but as you get older, you realise that it lasts forever.
No wonder they invented the little blue pills.
Although I do have a mate who swears that his sex life started when he got married and ended when they had their last child---his wife believes it's only for reproduction---good catholic girl

Anonymous said...

LOL! :-)

Clyde said...

Anon

You may well laugh now, but you will go through the stages of life and you will remember this

Danielle said...

Um, I am Catholic. Maybe that is my problem! LOL

Clyde said...

Danielle

There is this thought all over the world about catholic schoolgirls---but I think that is because of so many girl only catholic schools.

Now if you tell me that you are strictly following all of the Papal edicts, then you do have a problem

Macy said...

Maybe it's a mercy that your eyesight goes as you get older...

Clyde said...

Macy

I don't know about that---and lazer surgery can fix a lot of sight problems.
Remember---the older I get, the younger you look

hot girl said...

vary funny.

Clyde said...

Hot Girl

Funny but true---and it's life

Spiky Zora Jones said...

clyde: you surely do not know catholics. I went to catholic schools...lots of action there sweeties. behind the boy's gym it was getting felt up and having a ciggy before art class.

We'd would also wait out in front of the school...to pick up rides from college guys that drove by.

It's the catholic uniform, sweetie. Guys got all worked up over us in in our catholic school uniforms.

can't say I waited...I just want my fair share. that's not too much to ask for...is it?

ciao honey. xxx

Dutch donut girl said...

"Australian men aged between 75 and 95 are still active between the sheets".

Good for them! Go for it, and have fun.

Clyde said...

Miss Jones

Ha ha ha---yes I know---we used to hang around outside the Catholic girls school--
You have to love a woman in uniform

Clyde said...

Donuts

I don't think it's just Australian men.
I met an old Danish guy with the same surname as me---he told me that he was one of 23 children that his father had with three wives--he out lived the first two and was 96 when this old guy was conceived----go the Danes

Missed Periods said...

Lucky me! I'm married to an Aussie. I had better eat my spinach to keep up.

Just telling it like it is said...

An't that the truth...when I was in nursing school there was an out break of STDs in the old folks home...shockingly the nurses said the women preferred to have sex with other women what ever that freak stuff means...I don't want to imagine for I have seen way to many old naked butts

Clyde said...

Missed

If he's a real Aussie, he's probably gonna have a beer and fall asleep til to wake him.
But I have to admire a girl who's prepared

Clyde said...

Just
You are such a sweet girl
I can see you walking in on two oldies mounted up and puffing and just giving them their nightly meds and a warm sponge to clean up---such a thoughtful nurse

Just telling it like it is said...

Your so right I would act like nothing was wrong...shot of penicillin for that gonorrhea that you have...this hurts me more than you!!!

Clyde said...

Just

What, no cheering and popcorn

Just telling it like it is said...

If I have to give a penicillin shot there will be no eating near any of the rooms...I'm a germaphobe