WEDDING NIGHT

We all dream that our wedding night will be something special.

OK, I suppose it is that little more special for those who have chosen to save themselves for the big night---well, I'm not so sure.
A lot of people don't perform too well under the stress of great expectation and to tell the truth, most guys are bloody hopeless without a road map or an operation manual.
Now I've turned a girl or two over in my life and I have yet to find operating instructions tattooed on their arse.

Now ladies, you can stop that chuckling and stone throwing and think back to your first time---come on, who took charge.
I have to tell you that it is painful when you try to drive that thing like a stick shift and doing the five finger shuffle with a hand full of nuts can bring the evening to a painful screaming halt.

So if it's gonna be your first time, take your time to explore the terrain, ask questions and answer them honestly, nothing is out of bounds if you both agree and no, you can't use Vick's Vaporub (mentholated heated chest rub) as a lubricant.

OK, well my bride and I decided on a fairly cheap wedding and spend the money on a honeymoon and a home deposit.
It was a great decision, especially when I found out that her debts were bigger than my savings---
Anyway, we got married in the front garden of her parents house and had the reception in the back garden---the weather gods were kind and, OK, I even cried--well, what do you expect from a guy when he standing there talking to his mates and he turns around to see the most beautiful vision in white walking towards him---I don't know about the rest of you at your wedding or another, but it was breath taking and she was there for me.

The day was fantastic---well there was one hiccup but really didn't take much gloss off the day.
There was plenty of food, plenty of booze and a great casual atmosphere.
I behaved very well and had little to drink and just enough to eat---I knew that we were heading for the honeymoon suite and that it should be a special night.

I thought that we would be the first to leave but it turned out that we were among the last
We arrived at the motel---the place was rocking---every car in the park had "Just Married" on one window or another---you could smell it in the air---hormones were running amok and we were about to join the action.
OK, I have to be honest here---this was not going to be our first time---although we hadn't lived together, we didn't miss too many nights---and of course, you cant drive home in that condition.
But we were now married---this was our wedding night----SPECIAL

My beautiful bride wanted the bathroom to herself and I heard a few stumbles in there but out she came---well, I nearly cried again--it was like Christmas---my best ever present was there in the best wrapping I had ever seen and I was going to enjoy unwrapping that very slowly.
I started to undress when my beautiful bride said to me---"Honey, I'm hungry, I want a yiros"----she grabbed me and held me tight and said ---"I'm sorry--I didn't eat much but I drank a lot and I really need something to eat"
What is a guy to do---his pants are around his ankles, he is as horny as you can get, but his loving bride is hungry.
I could have gone for a quickie to take the edge off, but this was our wedding night, so up with the pants, kiss the bride, find the car keys and head off to get her food.
I was only gone for 20 minutes---that motel was still rocking---there was a low sound of the moaning of satisfaction---so I dashed up to our room.
And there she was---my beautiful bride, passed out on the bed snoring her head off.

Normally, I wouldn't have tried to wake her but this was our wedding night and she was so hungry---
Well, the result was
Me sitting out on the balcony eating a yiros listening to the sounds of sex from every direction except from my room---it was snoring like a buzz saw.

OK, there was very good morning sex but the wedding night had gone and nothing was said---
There was some good times but overall they are right.
It starts heading down hill after the wedding night----well, it did for me
But I still like a good yiros

(Yiros---Greek marinated lamb with salad and garlic sauce in a wrap)