CELEBRATING SORROW

Today is Fathers Day in Australia

A day when so many people celebrate having or being a father.
A day of respect for fatherhood.
A day when families get together. A family day.

There are a few family days during the year and hopefully some of them are the reasons for families forgetting about anger and fear and getting together and remembering that they are a family.

The weather has not been kind over the past week but this morning the sun shone and I walked the beach with my dog.
I spoke to my father and told him that I loved him.
And as a tear rolled down my cheek, I told him that I missed him.

My father died some years ago and I spread his ashes on the beach he loved to walk.

I have no family, so these family days are not so happy but they are a good reminder of the wonderful people who have passed through your life.

It's my Mum's birthday soon.
I'll talk to her and tell her that I love her.

She is on the beach with Dad---

Sometimes I want to stay with them

COY ABOUT CONQUESTS

We all know that guy
You know the one---the guy who brags about his conquests with the girls. You know---the one who has a new conquest every week yet he has never had a relationship.
You know---that guy who says "why buy a book when you can join a library"

Personally, I think that most of them have joined a library and are home every night reading a book----but they call them studs.

And we all know that girl
You know the one---the girl that all of the guys talk about and they have all been "with". You know---the one who has a great personality an talks to everyone but they never seem to be in a long term relationship.

Personally, I think that they are usually great people and can be friends with both guys and girls and don't need to be in love or in a relationship----but they call them sluts.

How judgemental are we ?
Guys get a medal that most of them don't deserve.
Girls get a label that none of them deserve.

But then you get into a relationship---a relationship that you want to be in with a partner you would really love to spend a long time with---maybe a life time, and then you become very coy about previous conquests.

It's one of those tricky quandaries. If you admit to too many previous partners then you might appear more than a a little promiscuous.
Your reputation as a stud wont impress your prospective partner and of course, that double standard labelling you as a slut, definitely wont impress any one.

But then if the number that you admit to is too small, then you might be perceived as an inexperienced prude or inadequate lover.

Some recently released research--(geez, who does this research--I've never been asked) shows that there is a split between the genders when it comes to answering that embarrassing question.
Of course most men lie---but most of them increase the number.
But only about a third of women lie but the greatest majority of those reduce the number.

The average number of sexual partners, according to this survey was seven for women and thirteen for men.
The one thing that they didn't make clear was were these figures for a lifetime of for the past year.
Now world population figures say that there is 52% females and 48% males, so you have to say that some of these "studs" are yet to pop the wax in their ears and there could be a "slut" or two who has been around the clock a few times.

But who really wants to ask these questions---who cares---who really wants to know.
Doesn't a partners sexual life begin from the day that you met them--?----after all, aren't you the best root ever ?

I've gotta stop reading the papers

HORSE OF ANOTHER COLOUR

There is an old English saying--"That's a horse of another colour"---basically meaning that it is a whole new story---or it is something else completely-----but this is the literal meaning

OK, if you have read here for a while, you would know that I have been tied up with racing horses from one code or another for far too many years.
My first foray into harness racing / trotting involved becoming a client of an 84 year old female trainer.

Now this lady had come to Australia from England with her husband and family, bringing an English thoroughbred stallion to our shores.
She was a brilliant horsewoman who had a great love of horses.
She had been involved with show riding all of her life and working thoroughbred gallopers for so many years----she was from an era where harness horses were not just for racing but were an accepted way of transport.

OK, so I had been with her for a few years and had been well educated by her and her 65 year old stable foreman, in racing harness horses and the respect for and caring for horses----they were people who had a great respect for the animals in their care and I had almost become part of their stable team.

Now here's the story----
I had my own horse transporting float
Now we had three horses racing at one of our country track in a midweek races---
So, Clyde, can you take a day off work and transport one of the horses for us ?---of course, I'm going to do it.
Now I get to the stables ready to go and my lovely old trainer tells me to take the horse that is in the first race---he is not a good traveller and that I should head off as soon as I can to give him time to settle in on the race course---
It was a nice warm day and I had brushed this magnificent looking grey horse out and had him ready to go----but as I loaded him, my old trainer yelled out that I should travel him in a woolen rug---get one out of the trunk in the harness room---a good one, a clean one-----so of course I did----this beautiful red English rug with contrast trimmings.

OK, so they told me that he travelled badly but it was a horror trip to the racecourse---this horse kicked out and moved around the float every mile of the trip.
I got to the course and unloaded the horse----I noticed that the bottom of the float was wet, not only from his urine but from sweat---I took the horse to his tie up stall and took off the red rug----there it was----oh shit.
The dye had run from the red rug and I had a pink horse on my hands.
It was before mobile phones, so I was alone with this pink horse, due to race in about 90 minutes.

I went to the chief racing steward and asked for a veterinary inspection and a stewards inspection on the horse----
All they could do was laugh but there was nothing wrong with him and he was cleared to race.
I was harnessing him up when the chief steward came down to see him----sorry Clyde, I had to come down when they told me he was pink----and walked off laughing.
I couldn't help but think of what my dear old lady trainer was going to say when she saw him but that turned out to be the least of my worries----
The other car and float carrying my trainer, her daughter and the stable foreman had broken down, so I was left to get this pink horse into the parade ring and onto the race track.
His race driver came to take him from me in the parade ring and all he could say was---fuck Clyde, he's pink, he is actually fucking pink----
Great observations, but I gave him his instructions and let him head off to the track---my instructions could have been to hide the big pink bastard in the field but he had not won in 14 starts, so it was all about confidence.
I saw my trainers car arrive as I left the parade ring and went to help them unload the other two horses---they were more worried about how I had got on with the big grey---I said nothing other than he was on the track and ready to go.

Now luckily my trainer had this superstition thing about not watching her horses race, so it was only the stable foreman and I who walked up to the mound to watch the race.
The first thing he said was, fuck, that horse looks pink, now where is Pookie----I've gotta tell you something Jim----and I told him the whole story
Now Threyshun, stable name Pookie, had never won a race and we weren't too confident after his trip and change of colour, but of course he just had to stand out to the crowd and jump to the front.
The course commentator had to make comment on his colour which confused my poor old trainer who was listening in----
I think it was the only time on a racetrack that I was almost hoping for the horse to drop out and finish in the middle of the field and old Pookie had never won a race, but of course he lead from start to finish.

My dear old trainer was extatic until she saw Pookie heading back to the stall---and when the chief steward turned up, she thought we were going to be swabbed for drugs and tried to explain the colour-----but the chief steward laughed and congratulated her on the first pink horse to race and indeed win a race.

She would never again let me leave home with a horse until she had inspected it and its rugs.
Threyshun's owners lived interstate and commented when they got his racing photo that he looked a little pink----my trainer said it must be some tint in the photo.

Never before and never again has a pink horse raced on any track in Australia---maybe I hold a world record that will never be broken.

Oh, Threyshun---he never won another race

NOW I'VE HEARD IT ALL

How many times have your heard that---I've heard it all.
And a lot of times that you will say that in your life will be after hearing some new rule in relation to schools and / or children.

I will never agree with child abuse or with parents badly beating their children but I am afraid that I will always agree with some sort of corporal punishment administered by a fair minded parent or teacher.

The Government Child Services Departments of the world seem intent on empowering children to become self regulating and with more rights than any adult.

It is now not acceptable for parents or teachers to speak harshly to or embarrass children in front of anyone.

But what will happen when these kids grow up and get a job ?
Will they be allowed to act as they like in the work place ?

Well, they probably will because if admonished in any way, it will be against Equal Opportunity Regulations, or Workplace Relations Rules.

Don't laugh, I can see it coming---these regulations for kids are going to carry forward to adulthood.


OK, so here it is----carry this one forward



You are not going to believe it, but yes, I read it in an interstate paper.

Child psychologists and school counsellors have suggested that it is OK and indeed healthy, for year 1 and year 2 children to masturbate in class.
What the fuck ?
We are talking about 5 to 7 year old children.

Now I don't know about you, but I didn't get into tampering with myself until I was much older----at least 12 or 13..
And basically the story around at the time was that if you did it, you would go blind and end up with hair on the palms of your hands---I now wear glasses but the hands are smooth.
We were discouraged from hiding in our bedrooms or behind the shed and tampering with ourselves, now they want 5 to 7 year olds to beat one off in class and teach everyone else how it's done.
Maybe in the end they will get graded on their performance and the teachers will hand out tissues.-----hmm, maybe they will supply a little towel with their uniforms

The worrying thing is that some professional has suggested this-----
Then you have to worry that it's gonna happen----then that those 5 to 7 year olds will want to carry it on into teenage years
I can just see that----a 16 year old boy beating one off in class next to a 16 year old girl----or over a 25 year old teacher----

And then carry it forward----those 5 year olds are going to be adults working in an office---well, they let me do it at school, why cant I do it in the office---I have rights.

NEXT

BOYS CLUB

I cannot believe that any respected organisation in the western world is allowed to discriminate against women.
But here it is-----this week, July 2010, it was announced by one of the biggest employers in the world, that the board of directors and the chief executive officer (pictured below) have met and decided that they will not allow any woman to hold an executive position within the organisation



Indeed, the announcement from the Vatican this week is that they have decided to declare it as a SIN to ordain any woman within the Roman Catholic church.

OK, if you are at all genteel in your outlook, this is the stage you should stop reading and leave this site.

Right, now they've gone I have to say

How fucking dare they
Who the fuck do they think they are

They keep on proving to the world that they are living in the past and they are quite content to do so.
This mob, as an organisation, raises more money in charitable donations than any other charity in the world.
And compared to any other religion in the world, spend more money on their own infrastructure, executive officers and stored riches.
Admittedly, they spend plenty on charitable deeds, but when you have a look at the people on the front line performing valuable services, the majority are women.

But it doesn't matter how much work these women do under sometimes atrocious conditions, they cannot work their way up through the organisation---well maybe they can to a certain degree but now that it has been declared a sin to ordain women, they can never work their way into the inner sanctum of the executive officers.

With this edict being an unashamed public announcement from the chief executive officer, maybe it is about time that someone took this organisation to courts of equal opportunity in any western county, or maybe in every country and tested the legality of their rulings.

How can these men think that this is fair---and more than that, how the fuck can they make it a sin.
What do they think will happen if woman become priests?
Do they think that woman will not be able to resist their sexual urges and end up sinning with the choir boys ? ----oh no, we cant have any of that going on---not sex between males an females ---oh no no no, heaven forbid.

We have been breaking down the boys clubs in every industry in the world---but I'm betting that this one will never be broken

WORLD CUP / WORLD SERIES

You would have to be hiding in the wilds of Outer Mongolia not to know that the World Cup of Football / Soccer is being played in South Africa

A magnificent meeting of the countries of the world on the sporting fields of South Africa.
Of course I supported the Australian team---hey, I'm an Aussie and it was a team representing my country.
But they weren't there for too long---the world football game or soccer as we call it in Australia, is not our number one football game.----but we are improving and in 4 years time, we could be more competitive.
Once Australia was out, my allegiances changed to The Netherlands and I'm hoping they can go all the way---all the way in the World Cup to become champions of the world.



But who ever wins, they will truly be the World football Champions.

Now to all of my friends from the USA.
Your team has just competed in this world championship and have done extremely well and you should be justly proud of your players.
Hopefully, like Australia, your country will be more competitive in four years time and one day, even be world champions.

But I will never understand the mentality of a sporting nation that runs an internal competition, not playing against any other country and lays claim to it being a world series championship.
I have little doubt that if there was a true world series of baseball, open to all nations, that the USA would win more games than they would lose and that they would probably be world champions more often than not----but until you are playing against the rest of the world, how can you have a world series.

WITHOUT A TRACE

I am the end of the line

My father was an only child but produced two sons
My brother died young without having married or produced children and you know my story---no kids, so I am the end of the line.

My father told me that he did not want to be buried when he died---he wanted to be cremated and his ashes scattered on our local beach.
My brother asked me to have him cremated and his ashes scattered at the State Athletics track----he was a coach, a national coach who had devoted his life to his sport---he had been appointed to the Olympic coaching panel about a month before his cancer was diagnosed and died before he could live his dream.
My mother decided that she wanted her ashes spread on our beach with the ashes of my old Labrador but with a smirk on her face, asked that I move them down the beach a little from where my fathers were spread.

As part of my inheritance, I gained control of my father's family burial plot at the local cemetery and thus the fate of the remains of my paternal great grandfather and all of those who followed---a total of nine.

So of course, the year after I take control, the 99 year lease on the plot expires and I am asked to renew the lease or the plot will be resumed by the cemetery trust.

Resumed, what does that mean---well they will take it back and any remains buried there will be buried deeper and the plot used by someone else.
OK, that's easy, I'll lease the plot again for another 99 year---but no----leases are now for a maximum of 25 years.
So I have this responsibility to my family and I haven't visited the grave for 10 years, so I go to see what I should do.
The headstones that were there were faded and unless you knew the history, they were unreadable-----those of a great uncle and three children were missing.

Well, my parents aren't there and my brother has his place and I can only get a 25 year lease and then what----so I decided to exhume all of the remains, have them cremated and spread them on the beach----great plan Clyde til I am told that it will cost $1500 per person to dig them up---that's nine times $1500---then each must be removed by a funeral director individually and they must be cremated individually ---got a bulk deal there---$5,000 for the lot----and I have to get a health inspector there for the day and pay his wages, get Court Orders supported by the Attorney General---do it yourself, around $2,000---
So it's going to cost me $20,000 plus and I only met two of these people and don't even remember them------that plan was dismissed, as was a new 25 year lease because there was no one to continue with it after me.

My friends / executors know that there should be a gathering at the local pub for all of those who would like a last drink and that my ashes should be on the beach with the rest of the clan---that's fine and I am content with that.
But with no monument stones at the cemetery and the rest of us being on the beach, who will ever know that we have been here---a whole family gone without a trace.
A man from Denmark took a chance on life and came to Australia alone and started his own new world legacy and no one will remember.---I can't let that happen

So that $20,000 that I can't spend now can come out of my estate and I have done a deal with the local council that they will erect two beach front seats, overlooking my beach, with all of my family's names on little brass plaques on the back of the top rail.
Maybe no one will read them but maybe someone will and remember that we were here