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Sunday 16 October 2011

MY JOB ATE MY LIFE

All through my life I have never been one to have a big circle of friends.

At school it was always one or two friends, but a lot of school friendships.
From the age of 7, I was always friends with one guy
We went through different sporting careers, ran with different groups but we always came back together as that friend that you can always depend on.

He joined the airforce and was posted to interstate and overseas bases, but we always kept in touch
I went on with life with friends from sport and from work and I had another life with my horses and made friends there, but in the end, they seemed to move on when things changed.
I still see a lot of them but they are more acquaintances than friends.

I got married and moved to another area---all of our friends seemed to be my wifes's family or friends of their family.
For six years I did not see my school mate because of an argument between wives.
I worked two jobs to buy a house and make things more comfortable in my married life.

My marriage ended and so did all of the friendships from that time but luckily my old school friend was there for me----
I lost my house and most of my money in a fairly bitter divorce---bitter I suppose because she wanted everything including my dog and didn't care what she did or said to get it
The only thing that was never mentioned was my retirement insurance (superanuation)----so I never mentioned it and gave her the rest.

My life was turned on it's head so I turned to work to try to re-establish myself and unfortunately got lost in working.
I worked all of the overtime that I could get and worked nights and weekends to get myself back on top.

I made it---I bought a house, I bought a new car and had my finances back in very good order.
The only thing I forgot to do was to socialiize with people from work or make time to find and establish friendships.
Yes, I made a lot of work friends, but they were work friends---friends at work and the occasional work function

My school friend was still there and once out of the airforce, ended up working with me----we drove home every night together.
A strange, lonely married girl came into my life and we became very good friends---she lived close to me and our regular friday night involved a few hours at a local bar with her and my best mate.

My school friend, my best mate, always wanted to move to one of our warmer northern states, but for years we talked about retiring together, playing very bad golf and travelling together---his wife was happy with that because Europe did not interest her and she was happy to get him out of the house occasionally.
But two years before retirement, he bought a block of land in one of those warmer states and ended up retiring a year before me and moving to his new home.
The friday night drinks stopped when the strange girl left her husband and moved away.

I didn't really notice til I retired that working those long hours had left me with no social life and only work mates---and of course, my work mates are still at work.

Yes, I holiday in the northern state with my friend and I often talk to the strange girl, but I realise now that they are my only real friends in life.

Yes, it is a good feeling to own your own home and to have enough money to live on, but it would be a lot more enjoyable with friends.

Dont forget every aspect of your life---money isn't everything